8/17/2023 0 Comments Confessions of a fit foodie burger![]() ![]() ![]() She would constantly press me to diversify my diet, which I tried to pass off not as a diet but as a way to differentiate myself from the Barbies. So determining I suddenly needed to pay attention to my food intake and physical appearance, especially in a way that was grandiose and annoying, put my mom on a mom’s highest alert.īut whereas my mom believed that me living out my totally normal teenage life was her hell incarnate, I was equally sure she spent every night dreaming of new ways to ruin me. ![]() That scrawny figure combined with the short shag haircut I gave myself one unfortunate day after a Meg Ryan movie marathon gave me the appearance of a malnourished 9-year-old boy. At 15, even though I believed my weary and tormented teenage soul had already endured enough suffering for a lifetime, my body had not yet endured the full onslaught of puberty: I stood barely 5 feet tall in the morning and weighed 87 pounds soaking wet. The reason my mom thought my vegetarianism was an evil I was perpetrating against her was that I was delusional. And I scorned everyone else for not immediately following suit. The day I decided to adopt a counter culture lifestyle I knew nothing about other than how to pronounce it with self-righteous pomposity, I came out to everyone I knew. To get my sedentary body beach ready I was going to have to pretend I cared about things like food and fitness, but to make that believable I couldn’t vary my character too much from my regular snarky, judgy, bookish self. I, on the other hand, was an avid reader. The Cheerleader Barbies lived for nothing other than cheering, cheering and cheering, an activity that made their stupid teenage bodies hard as boards. Malibu Barbie’s mom was an exercise nut who insisted Malibu Barbie always a have fresh manicure, an even tan and toned biceps. My girlfriends-Malibu Barbie, Cheerleader Barbie, Cheerleader Barbie, Cheerleader Barbie, and Cheerleader from our Rival School Barbie-were inherently image conscious and diet focused. In the spring of my 10th grade year of high school I was psyching myself up for my first spring break at the beach with my girlfriends without my parents, and I had found the most perfect, wildly expensive, red striped, two-piece bathing suit that had the potential to secure for me a moderately sufficient middleish spot on the social food chain for the rest of my high school career. However, even though torturing my mother was certainly high on my list of priorities as a teenager, she was slightly misremembering the motives behind this particular angst-driven undertaking. First of all, what mother thinks her child decides to eat vegetables to antagonize her? And second of all, are we sure she was talking about me? I was on the phone the other day with my mom bragging about what a grownup I am now and how many vegetables I can eat without having to fake faint, when she said that she was genuinely proud of me, not like that time as a teenager when I became a vegetarian just to antagonize her. Also, be sure to do up some fries (I loved baked sweet potato fries!) so you can dip them in the extra sauce. I suggest serving with lettuce for crunch and maybe onions if that’s your thing. I’ll totally keep it a secret if you will. It’s so easy to whip up with just a few things you already have. Oh and the southwest sauce seems fancy and will totally impress all your friends, but it’s not fancy at all. The beef (grass-fed, lean) is the star, the cheddar and southwest sauce complement it in the most tasty way. If you come over to our house during the warm months I will be pattying up these burgers and Nate will be throwing them on the grill! I grew up in a plain patty kind of household and converted to a throw everything but the kitchen sink in patty and then after a few overly salty-spiced disasters, we’ve landed in the middle. This burger recipe is quintessentially “our style” of burger. But not just any burger (oh no-no-no) BIG, JUICY, CHEESEBURGERS with sauce oozing out the sides with lettuce and a soft bun. Is it warming up where you live? Our high today is 60 degrees! This girl is ready to bust out the shorts and t-shirts and fire up the grill! I was out running last week and someone in our neighborhood was grilling already….mmmm….that smell had me craving burgers. ![]()
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